Pleasantville

An artists impression of Sunderland

Wotcha.

A double dose of easter eggcellence from our Hotspur-crossed bunnies on the way, and what better mood to enter the old 2 games in 3 days period, than the one we find ourselves in right now; swagger restored in the nicket of time, as we stare down the barrel of 7 league fixtures that will determine who lines up for us on the continent next season. Will it be the Tommy ‘Charlie Bucket’ Carroll dancing around the assembled might of FC Tyjxfryjjxxx in Romania, or Eden ‘Ed’ Hazard tearing the Catalans a new one at Camp Nou? What do you mean he hasn’t signed yet? Get ya faaaaaaaakin chequebook out Levy you onion!

I have a friend who went to Sunderland last year, and he’s not been quite the same since. A marvellous result failed to inject any colour to his world, and the once dancing, playful and wistful boyhood chum has gone and turned… well, grey. According to his harrowing tale, the roads were grey. The pavement was grey. The houses were grey. The sky was grey. I imagine it to be like ‘Pleasantville’, minus the ham fisted attempts at delivering a racial equality message. Oh Reece Witherspoon, what have you done?

From the harrowing tale my lost friend tells, Harry could do worse than sellotape kaleidoscopes over the eyes of our chaps as our fun bus travels through the streets of slumberland, removing them only for the game, where I have been reliably informed that the Sky Sports team have painted the northern grey grass a deep ‘southern’ green, in order that global audiences remain calm and avoid melting in their arm chairs. As for the result, a rejuv’d (I’ve been working on rejuv’d to replace rejuvenated for a while now. Hope the effort shows?) Sunderland away is no easy three-sy, and it wouldn’t be typical Tottenham if signs of recovery suffered an instant setback. The returning Lennon will play only one game, according to Harry, but I wouldn’t be surprised to see him do 45 in each. Late-ish equaliser and we’ll draw 1-1.

Norwich and Paul Lambert (or budget Brendan Rogers) for a bit of Monday resurrection and a nice 2-0 home win would be marvellous. I have no Norwich related insight to offer (other than cheap shots about inbreeding and a fully stocked armoury of Partridge quotes of course), but on the footballing side, it appears they’ve been rather good, claiming the same number of points as Swansea, but without anywhere near the love-in that their Welsh fellow-promotees and manager have enjoyed. Like Swansea however, Norwich have gone about things the right way, and in so doing, set themselves up for a football match which we should have too much for them to cope with.

Merry Easter you marvellous little chicks.

***If I may be so bold as to turn your attention to the top left of this page, there’s a link to my JustGiving page. For you see, I am running this years London Marathon in aid of the Teenage Cancer Trust. If my sums are right, and if every visitor to the page gave just a pound… There'll be an extra twenty quid in no time.***