Let Me Entertain You

Haaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!

Seems to be our mantra of late. 6 times we’ve clawed victory from the jaws of defeat already this term (5 wins, 1 draw, but who's counting?), which of course doesn’t include our ‘glorious defeats’ at YBB and Meelan, the later giving us the away goals to ensure we finish top of our CL group as long as we beat Tchventay.

There was something about the manner of last Wednesday’s cake walk over Bremen that had me shifting uneasily in my seat. Tottenham, the fancied team, went all professional in scoring the early goal, killing it off before the break, and brandying the pudding by scoring a 3^rd late on. Not even our standard late concession when we were cruising, such was our tight-fistedness. Where was the drama? Is this what fans of the ‘sky 4 (now 3)’ clubs are served up on a regular basis? Send it back says I. Give me the ‘last-minute extravaganza Tottenham special’ please, and don’t skimp on the goals.

We could analyse the contradictions all day. Minimal early focus, followed by strict adherence to attacking principles. An extraordinary team spirit following times of looking like a group of strangers. These boys have been watching too many Rocky films. Sundays comeback victory against the ‘pool, while not in the same grand Hollywood cinescope of last weeks win at the Woolwich Wanderers, was just as important. I’m sure it’s no good For Danny Levy’s heart rate, but sending the fans home with maximum buzz has got to be worth all the flutters and frustrations.

Why not swing by the megastore on your way out?

Don’t mind if I do, when’s the DVD out?

Tottenham v Liverpool- Ratings, Report and a Warning

Like yesterdays game; Couple of good moments, essentially rubbish

If playing poorly and winning is the sign of a good side, we must be onto something rather special.

Some ratings

Gomes, 6- Brave punch late on but not much else to do besides.

Hutton, 5.5- Decent support for Lennon but should have been tighter to the empty shell of a man in the ‘Torres 9’ shirt.

Kaboul, 6- Shame he had to go off, let’s hope it’s not serious.

Bassong, 6.5- Slow to react, quick to recover. Torres and Liverpool of 2 years ago would have been out of sight.

Liam Gallasgher, 7- Mad fer it. He’s just really good at being a defender.

Benny, 6- Good stuff out-weighed the mental stuff. I like him.

Lennon, 7- Could it be? Yes it could. Something’s coming, something good. Good performance on Wednesday, another one plus a vital goal yesterday. Expect to see lots more ‘jet heeled winger’ references and inappropriate use of exclamation marks from the official site in the coming weeks.

Wilson, 2- Had a stinker in the first half, mainly bypassed in the second. Any pass required to go over 10 yards was misplaced and poor positioning meant only a couple of tackles. Worrying, especially if Jenas is out for a while.

Modders, 8- Best player on the pitch, fantastic run and goal (forced o.g., but let’s not split hairs). Keep him fit.

Bale, 6- More chalk on his boots than on a school blackboard. Kept penned on the line by the joint forces of Derek Kite and the best right back Ingerland have available (no, really). No lack of effort but no magic this time. Now only worth £49 mill.

Rafa, 5- No time to do nuffink. Fingers crossed it’s just a pull and not a tear.

Defoe, 5.5- Still working his way back, so lets not be too harsh. Horrid penalty though. Ran about a bit, and a couple of pot shots for his trouble.

Crouch, 7- Worked his nads off. Not his fault we kept hitting it to him. The congested midfield and deep defending meant ‘hit the big man’ more often than not, especially in the closing stages. Won it almost every time and found a team mate just as often.

In terms of quality, yesterdays offering was pretty dire, not helped by the early wonky hammy picked up by Rafa. The gamble to play him after a week without training backfired, his muscles weren’t ready for the pace or the cold and he duly tightened up and twanged. Defoe on, 4-4-2, and we looked a bit lost.

For long spells, the cold was the only thing with any bite, and a sloppy concession just before half time compounded a pretty dire 45 minutes. With Wilson MIA, Modric had a lot of work to get through in the 2^nd half if we were going to get back into it, and he duly delivered. His profligate passing in recent weeks gave way to a grabbing-game-by-scruff-of-neck-and-shaking-vigorously shift, his superb goal capped off a performance of top quality in a game that was far from it. The (effectively) 6 man midfield made the achievement even more cap dothing-worthy.

A welcome return to form and net finding for Aaron Lennon was just as satisfying as the 3 points. Remember when Spiderman had to choose whether he saved MJ or the school bus from falling off that bridge? He couldn’t do both. Such will be the choice of defences throughout the land with Gaz Baz on one side and Lennon on the other. Dual fuel.

Just a quick word on our visitors. On the 11^th of May 2008, Liverpool took their annual coach trip to the Totters for the season finale. A Ramos led Spurs were pretty insipid, but Liverpool were inspired. Torres looked every inch the deadliest striker in the world heading into Euro 2008 and I remember thinking how we were at least 5 years from being anything near their level. The easiest 0-2 you’ll see at WHL the outcome.

How times have changed. I don’t wish to sound condescending, or indeed too full of sympathy. Their loss has been our gain after all. The reasons for their demise have been well publicised, but it was just a bit sad to see a team so close to achieving something big and playing with a swagger, reduced to such negative, callow football.

There are those who will say ‘f**k ‘em’, which isn’t entirely unfair, but for those supporters to be brought back down to earth so quickly has got to be hurtful. As a lifelong fan of a club on the cusp of achieving something special, I sympathise and hope we heed the warning.

Interesting stat I heard on the wireless. In 68 EPL away games in charge of Blackburn, Fulham and now Liverpool, Roy Hodgson has won just 7.

Thursday night, channel 5? You’d better believe it.

… and the Spurs go marching on. 6 points off the top and a trip to Brum up next. Marvellous.

Some Bits About Totters Hotters versus Liverpool

Graeme Souness always vehemently denied the existence of the many love children he was accused of spawning around Liverpool

It's been a good week to be a Spurser.

The Goons got Tottenham'd, and Bremen, their confidence already in tatters from their own '2 from 8' (copyright Redknapp Cash Quick Enterprises Ltd) style start, were swatted convincingly aside, bearly a bead of sweat on the brows, or dirty scuffs on the shirts of our triumphant collective. Tiredness will be no factor.

Roy of the... 'pool has made himself at home. If home were a house half full of patient reds, willing to give him time, and the other half rabidly calling for his head on a platter. An away win at the fast improving Bolton the only 3 they've collected on their various coach trips this season, and not a lot of confidence that it's going to change come dinner time on Sunday. Even patriotic Irishman, BBC's own Mark 'Lawro' Lawrenson has them down for a 2-0 surrender. For once, I hope he's on the money.

Wednesdays smokescreen of Gazza Bazza's wonky shoulder has well and truly been blown away, so Harrys attention has turned to Rafael. He's rated 50/50 by Mr Redders so i'm betting he'll be the first name on the team sheet. With Gerrard out with Englanditis and Fernando's Tours on a business 'down-sizing' mission, the threat should come from the unpredictable/unfit/off-colour Joseph Cole or Derek Kite. A bit of focus should be enough while we wait for ol' Jamie to put through his own net again.

Enjoy it, wherever you may be watching it. I'll be back on Monday to try and work out how we Spurs'd it up.

Apologies for the crap aesthetics of the 'site'/redirect to blog page. I'll try and make it look a bit less crap soon.